Yes. You need to hire a copywriter.

OK. This is an actual sign I photographed in the actual world, on a ferry boat. Phew! I’ll try to ignore the design disaster. (Initial caps? Why?) The bigger problem is the copy itself. It’s a ridiculous number of words, muddying a very simple message. It’s like they were trying to make a sign nobody would read. (They dropped the ball, actually. They could have made it ALL CAPS. Or printed it in Chinese.)

I assume the writer was chosen out of expediency. The person in the front office who knows how to turn on the computer. Unfortunately, that’s not enough qualification for this job. So, forgiving my rudimentary design skills, here’s my proposed fix:

Lesson: when in doubt, hire a copywriter. And when you’re certain you can handle the job yourself, with not an iota of doubt; hire a copywriter.

=SE